As a man in the leader’s role, I appreciate a good follower as would any other leader. A good follower will try to set aside her musical style (at least for a second) to better understand me and dance with me. Ideally, she will find a way to do all her adornos and show her personal flare while still following me and accentuating my own style. The best followers somehow let me know what they want or like to do so that I may accommodate them as they accommodate me. The greatest followers make me feel like I’m a great dancer.

 

Tips for following:

1. Be a blank slate, 

Some women have too much ego about accepting the woman’s position. They see “following” as a threat to their individuality. But it’s not really about “following”. The dance is about enjoying the puzzle and connection between two different people fused together by music. You never know what dance will create itself in this magical moment. But for it to be magical, you must do your part but making yourself selfless.

Both partners are responsible for becoming selfless. A good leader will find a way to hear the music in a way that is enjoyable FOR YOU. He will find every opportunity to showcase your style in a way that compliments his…but only if you do your part (and follow him to that point).

 

2. Add your style in a way that fits his musicality.

Once you can hear the music the same way he hears it, you can choose to be passive and enjoy only his interpretation. Or you can become more active by inserting your style and your musicality.

 

Steps to following:

1. Communicate (CONNECT)

Take your time to connect with your partner. Communication is a two-way street with both partners giving feedback to further the conversation. Don’t just move with your partner but feel his energy. Where does he want you to go? Does he want you to move faster or slower? It’s ok to lose yourself in the dance but not your partner.

 

2. Have a presence (FORM)

The man should feel your physical presence when you’re dancing with him. He wants to know that he has a strong living and breathing human flesh woman in his arms. Having a good form and good embrace will help him feel your presence. The way that you move will also greatly enhance your presence.

 

3. Move easily (TECHNIQUE)

Having a quality of movement makes you easy to move. Being easier to move generally means being easier to dance with. Good technique allows you to dance beautifully no matter what direction you are taken. Good technique allows you to move in all

 

4. Enjoy the dance (ATTITUDE)

I especially enjoy dancers with a positive attitude. It shows when you simply enjoy the dance no matter what happens rather than trying to force the dance to go the way you expect. By staying positive and open-minded, you often discover a dance that was even better than what you originally expected.

 

Both the Man and Woman are Followers

The best dances are when both the man and woman follow each other. By follow, I don’t mean that both are passively waiting for the other to move first. It’s more like both are actively dancing in awareness of each other. With a strong connection, both of you will feel more musical together. Tango was meant to be synergistic. If for whatever reason you find a leader especially difficult to follow, it may be his fault and not yours. 😉